Horoscopes just for Nurses!
Aquarius
It’s sharing season, apparently, as one flu bug after another goes around work. Try wearing a mask at all times and washing your hands 37,000 times a day…unless they let you put your colleagues in isolation!
Pisces
Remember to keep a sense of proportion this week, Pisces! A simple debate — should nurses chew gum on the job or not? — has the potential to elevate your blood pressure to atmospheric levels! Learn to let irritations go; otherwise they’ll just stick around (and get in your hair and under your shoe…)
Aries
Denial…it’s not just a river in Egypt! But for all the luck you’ll have explaining that to the person in question, you might as well book a flight and take them there so you can demonstrate the difference!
Taurus
It’s all a learning experience. It’s all a learning experience. It’s all a learning experience.
Gemini
Isn’t it ironic how detox patients can drive one to drink?
Cancer
Appearances are deceiving, which is a fairly distressing piece of knowledge to have if you’re working Triage.
Leo
When people tell you never to surrender your power, Leo, they don’t actually mean you have absolute control of the remote control! Just a little tid bit you might want to take home with you!
Virgo
Calling in an emergency response team for biohazard containment might be a bit of an overreaction to the state of the Nurse’s station. Just saying…
Libra
Warning the patient that they’re about to feel a little prick turns into the most awkward misunderstanding you’ve ever had. Clarity is at a premium this week!
Scorpio
This week you’ll wonder why they just don’t make scrubs the distinctive color of feeding tube contents. That way you’ll never have to worry about stains!
Sagittarius
As your empty IV bag turns out to not be so empty and you take a saline shower, just think, if this was happening in a remote European spa, you’d pay top dollar for this experience…but instead, you’re getting paid (and soggy!)
Capricorn
Credibility is an issue for you this week, as patients fail to believe that the doctor doesn’t actually let you know when they’ll be coming by or that their 3,700 requests for additional pain medication have been forwarded along. Perhaps it would work better if you used sign language or interpretive dance to convey the information!
Star Charts by Suzanne LaBarne are for Entertainment Purposes ONLY!
