Journal of Nursing Jocularity

FAMOUS FOLKS WHO HAD TUBERCULOSIS

 

(sort of to the tune “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”)

 

Um diddle diddle diddle um spew and spray

Um diddle diddle diddle dum sputum’s grey

Famous folks in the past that had tuberculosis

Even tho the sound of it is something quite atrocious

If you say it loud enough you’ll always sound precocious

Famous folks in the past that had tuberculosis

Many famous Presidents all had the TB cough

Even tho politically we may begin to scoff

Roosevelt and Jackson

Had the TB scare

George Washington coughed his way across the Delaware

 

Um diddle diddle diddle dum spew and spray

Um diddle diddle diddle sputum’s grey

Many famous writers all had miasma too

Zane Grey, Nathaniel Hawthorne and Henry T. Thoreau

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

And Edgar Allen Poe

All the Bronte sisters

Wrote in bed as you well know!

Scientists like Madam Currie and Alexander Graham Bell

Had created something great but had TB as well

St Francis of Assisi talked and prayed to birds

We thought he had M.Avium but that was quite absurd!!!!!!!!

 

Umm diddle diddle diddle um AFB

Um diddle diddle diddle suspect TB

Scrofula attacked rich Holly wood

Consumption got the poor

Signs went up everywhere “Please don’t spit on the floor”

W.C.Fields, Eddie Cantor and Vivien Leigh

It didn’t matter what part they played

They all wound up with TB

Tragically on the silver screen

Consumptives romantically died

The great Greta Garbo coughed dramatically

While the audience cried

Lon Cheney was a monster,

Al Jolson sang his “Mammy” song

Mozart composed his music

Chopin played piano and coughed the whole day long

Dorothea Dix remade sanitariums safe for the mentally ill

She lived with overcrowding and

Thats why she fits the TB bill

There are many other famous folks that wrote or prayed or sang

While they rested quietly in bed..that led to fortune and fame

 From King TuT to Judy Collins..TB has touched them all…..

Unfortunately TB is everywhere…….from Chicago to Nepal

Um diddle diddle diddle  spew and spray

We hope there is a cure someday

Famous folks in the past who had Tuberculosis

If you say it loud enough you’ll always sound precocious

The fact that Tb is still here is something quite atrocious

Lets not help create anymore famous folks who have tuberculosis

During a recent fire drill, I was closing doors to patient rooms.  An 86 year old patient was talking on the phone when I reached her room.  As I started to shut her door, she asked, “What’s that ringing noise?”

“Don’t worry,” I said. “We’re just having a fire drill.”

As I was leaving, I heard her say, “No, everything’s just fine, dear.  The hospital’s on fire but a nice little nurse just came to lock me in my room.”

– From Kathryn Frasern, RN, C

(Are you Kathryn Frasern?  We’d love to hear from you! Drop us a line at Cindy@JournalofNursingJocularity.com!)

JNJ a magnet pulling humor people together

When I discovered the original JNJ 20 years ago, it was like a magnet attracting people from around the world who recognized the value of humor in nursing. I wasn’t even a nurse, but I always felt included in that interesting, quirky community. Now it’s time to welcome an entire new generation to this wonderful community through JNJ’s rebirth.

I’m still not a nurse, but I am contributing to nursing education redesign as a veteran curriculum designer. Today’s thought leaders, such as The Carnegie Foundation, Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and the Institute for Healthcare Improvement, are united in their cry for nursing education to transform and teach for understanding, rather than just memorization. And guess what helps make this transformation faster and more effectively than any teaching technique? HUMOR! (more…)

The allergists voted to scratch it

And the dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves

The gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it

but the neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve,

and the obstetricians felt they were all laboring under a misconception

The opthalmologists considered the idea short sighted

while the pediatricians said, “Oh, grow up!”

The psychiatrists through the whole idea was madness

The radiologists could see right through it,

and the surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

The internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow,

and the plastic surgeons said, “This puts a whole new face on the matter!”

The podiatrists thought it was a step forward,

but the urologists thought the scheme wouldn’t hold water.

The anasthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas,

and the cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.

In the end, the proctologists left the whole thing up to some assholes in Washington!

As a pre-med student, I had to take a difficult class in physics.  One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept when a student rudely interrupted to ask, “Why do we have to learn this stuff?”

“To save lives,” the professor responded quickly, and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again.  “So how does physics save lives?” he persisted.

The professor replied, “It usually keeps the idiots like you out of medical school!”