Journal of Nursing Jocularity

REPORTS FROM THE FRONT LINES OF THE GENDER WARS, ADDRESSED TO NURSES AND THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE THEM. SERIOUSLY RECORDED—WITH TONGUE (DEPRESSOR) FIRMLY IN CHEEK—FROM GREG GODEK, AUTHOR OF THE BESTSELLER 1001 WAYS TO BE ROMANTIC.

Valentine’s Day Revisited.

Nurses want to make the world a better place, right? Okay then . . . Would you like to sign our petition? We’re trying to collect a million signatures in an effort to create a national holiday devoted to love.

You say we already have Valentine’s Day? Well, we hate to be argumentative, but Valentine’s Day isn’t really a “holiday,” now, is it? (In our dictionary, a “holiday” is defined as “a festive time of no work; an officially sanctioned day of leisure and pleasure, usually devoted to a specific concept or celebration.”)

We believe that Valentine’s day is, at best, a pseudo-holiday. Something that our culture pays lip-service to, but that we don’t really take seriously. You know, like those other “holidays” such as Flag Day, Arbor Day and Ground Hog Day.

We believe that since most people hold “love” to be their highest value, there should be a special day of recognition devoted to it. You know, the way people value over-eating on Thanksgiving; and the way we pay homage to shopping on Christmas; and the way we celebrate explosives on the Fourth of July. Love should rank right up there, don’t you think?!?

So please consider signing our petition. You just might help change the world.

1) Pays better then fast food, though the hours aren’t as good.
2) Fashionable shoes and sexy white uniforms.
3) Needles: “Tis better to give than receive”
4) Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops…eventually.
5) Expose yourself to rare, exciting and new diseases. (more…)